10 Things Guys Will Never Tell Girls

By Victoria Robertson on March 24, 2015
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That’s right gentlemen, girls aren’t the only ones with a few secrets to hide. In fact, there are quite a few secrets that you haven’t let us in on yet.

But lo and behold, I was able to dig up a few that many men would agree they have successfully kept secret from their girlfriends … until now.

So here it is: 10 things guys will never tell girls.

1. They Don’t Understand Women’s Fashion.

That’s right. That pink lipstick women love so much, or those shorts that go up to their waist and are only a few inches short of being mom jeans, are annoying and unattractive.

I mean really, what guy wants to walk around with a lipstick stain on his face (unless it was put there by Emma Watson)? And ladies, you aren’t Emma Watson.

2. Women Are Kind Of Disgusting.

That hair. It’s all over the place. It falls off in clumps on women’s (and men’s) shirts, it turns into a nasty hairball in the washer/dryer and, most importantly, it clogs the drain that the guy in the relationship is then expected to unclog.

It’s disgusting.

3. Being Called Whipped Is Male Kryptonite.

No guy wants to hear his friends tell him he’s whipped. It’s the most demeaning, anti-masculine thing you can tell a man.

So ladies, even if he is whipped, don’t tell him that he is. He won’t hear the end of it from his friends and, to be honest, it affects him deep down in a way that no woman could understand.

4. They Love Girls’ Night.

Women tell their boyfriend they’re going to be gone all night and men are supposed to be upset? Uhm, no. The second the words “girls’ night” are uttered in the slightest, every guy is immediately planning his alone time.

And, spoiler alert, it’s probably a night of Call of Duty.

5. Being Drunk Isn’t Attractive.

Despite most girls’ beliefs, being drunk is not the way to pick up a guy. While most girls go out to the bar to flirt, a guy finds it’s a major turn off if the girl is belligerent.

No guy is so desperate that they want to hold their date’s hair before bringing them home.

So know your limits, ladies.

6. They Love What Women Hate.

If your boyfriend supports your feminist beliefs, odds are he’s lying to you. Most guys absolutely love demeaning female jokes, “guy” movies and anything that Seth MacFarlane has ever produced, acted in or voiced over.

So if you hate it, your male counterpart is probably obsessed with it.

7. They Are Overly Jealous.

If another male so much as glances at another man’s girlfriend, an oddly protective stance is sure to follow. He’ll either pull the girl in closer and shoot a look of ownership or prepare himself for a fight, because men are more jealous than they let on.

So keep this in mind when you feel the urge to bring up your ex, because I promise no good will come from that discussion. They keep their exes from you, it’s best you do the same.

8. They Will Always Look At Other Women.

This isn’t to say that all men are cheaters. All this means is men can’t stop themselves from looking. The looks don’t always mean something, and at the end of the day, it’s the girl they’re with that they will be thinking about at night.

And Emma Watson. But there’s no harm there.

9. Women Are Actually Ice Cubes.

Women are absolutely freezing. Men aren’t sure if women take the world’s coldest showers or if they make a daily commute to Antarctica, but for some reason women’s feet or hands touching any part of their boyfriend’s body is so shockingly cold, it hurts.

Your boyfriend bought you that heated blanket for his benefit, I promise.

10. They Want Compliments Too.

It’s kind of expected that a man will throw his girlfriend a compliment before they go on a date. “You look beautiful” or “wow” are the perfect go-to’s for this event. However, what women don’t think to do is throw a compliment back.

A man’s ego is a vast space that requires a boost here and there. So next time your boyfriend tells you how nice you look, be sure to let him know just how good he looks.

This isn’t a comprehensive list, nor is it one that’s universally accepted, but most men will agree that these are some of their best-kept secrets. So take these to heart ladies, because this isn’t an in you’re going to get often.

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Victoria is a dedicated writer who graduated from the University of Illinois with a Bachelor of Arts in English. She currently writes freelance pieces for various sites and works in Marketing for Myndbee Inc., promoting their current mobile app, Picpal.

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